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| As you know I don't like talking about personal shit, but this is something that has been bothering me so I need to get it out.
Over a week ago my mom told me that a boy that I used to babysit wrecked on a golf cart and was in the hospital suffering from swelling of the brain. For an entire week the doctors tried everything they could to reduce the swelling, but as of November 7th they couldn't do anymore. I went to the wake that was held for him today, and it was one of the saddest experiences of my life. Up until the moment I walked into the ceremony I had tried to not think about it much, but seeing him in the casket and the sadness of his family fucking destroyed me.
Even though the wake was held in the church I used to attend, all I could do was curse God most of the time. Although I don't really participate in any religion at this point, I would like to think that there is a reason for all of this, but I still can't understand it at this point.
For those of you who read this and still have an understanding of why God works this way; please pray for his family.
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| I just watched the movie Accepted, which is basically a college version of Camp No Where, but instead of Christopher Lloyd you have Lewis Black.... which is awesome. This movie is far from original or breakthrough, but it has it's points, by bashing the way that modern colleges are set up. It made sense to me, considering I graduated from college and still don't know what the fuck I want to do. What a waste of time and money.
In other news Golden Arm played Rockin on the River this past Friday, and I thought it was pretty fun even though we played half of our set in the dark and probably sounded like shit. That's what I love about the band; we just have fun. We aren't trying to fit into any scene, gain popularity, or get signed. We just do it for fun, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Bands that take themselves serious are just fucking stupid. Music was created for entertainment and fun, so why not have fun while doing it?
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| Everyone should watch this documentary http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/countryboys/. It's probably one of the best I've ever seen.
It's about 2 teenage guys growing up in eastern Kentucky, and all of the shit they have to overcome. It's pretty funny the first couple of episodes, and if you've ever spent time in eastern Kentucky you will understand why, but after that it becomes an amazing story.
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| I've been jobless for over a week now, and it's driving me crazy. I want to believe that this is some sort of sign that I shouldn't be working bullshit jobs that I didn't go to school for, but it still makes me poor.
Since I started my mac and cheese diet along with Old Milwaukee I've lost 7 pounds. I didn't even realize it until people told me, which probably isn't a good thing. However I am starting a new weight loss program called, "Get Poor."
Other than that most of my days consist of me waking up around 1-2 pm, eating soup, maybe taking a shower, looking at the classifieds, working on my portfolio, then deciding to play the Sims 2 instead.
I did watch a Driven episode about Kanye West on VH1 tonight, so maybe that will sink some inspiration into me.
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| So as many of you may or may not know I have been working for Dick's Sporting Goods for the last 3 weeks. I was hired on as a temporary, but at the interview the guy told me that the temporaries usually end up getting hired. I was scheduled to work in stock, but I ended up helping the bike and fitness section assemble equipment and worked in that area more than stock.
Today I went in at 10am like I was scheduled and was at work for 2 hours, until the manager called me back into his office and explained to me that I was only hired on as a temporary, and that they didn't need temporaries anymore. It makes sense, but why was I still on the fucking schedule for every god damn day of this week. He told me to hold on to my gear because they may need me in a couple of weeks. In the mean time what the fuck am I supposed to do?
This experience has only deepened my hatred towards corporate America. A wonderful land where people are not people and can be used whenever it is convenient for the corporation. A wonderful land where a person can be disregarded in one day and know one else loses a bit of sleep.
I fucking hate this country.
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